Midnight Worries

Here I am in the middle of the night writing a blog when I should be sleeping and dreaming about warm fuzzy nice stuff. I have relocated at my Grandma's house for the night because I literally can't stand it at my dad's house. It is dirty, boring, annoying and there's no food there at all. And at the moment I am really really hungry but I dont have the money to go get some food. But I knew my Grandma's house had food. My Grandma's house is like my sanctuary it is definitely my home away from home and my Grandma is defintely my mom that I never had. I never used to be able to leave my dads house once I got home. It's like once I entered the house I was trapped and I have come to resent that feeling greatly. I now have worked up the courage to just tell my dad that I am leaving and it is quite refreshing to just get up and leave on your own. I can't go to sleep because I have a pretty bad headache and the only thing to do is wait it out. It's okay because I dont have work tomorrow. I dont really have any plans for tomorrow and I will probably sleep alot. I have popped in some tasty cinnamon rolls into the oven they still have 15 minutes to cook though...oh well they are yummy. Maybe I will have some cereal after that...maybe some ice cream too?

I think my headache has to do with my lingering uncertaintly of my financial situtation. Its not like I'm in any kind of debt or anything its just I feel a little bit of pressure because this is the first time in my life I will have to pay bills. And pay them on time of course...thats the tricky part. This month it just so happens that my car payment and my insurance payment are both due. This only happens once every three months so hopefully it wont' be as bad as it sounds. But basically that totals to be about 500ish those two added up so thats almost all of a check with about 100-200 left over and where does that extra money go...well I have an internet payment, I usually have a little bit of money to pay off on my credit card and pretty soon I will have a cell phone payment that could be anywhere from 30 dollars to who knows how much (hopefully i can discipline myself a bit more on those outside text messages) so if you do the math that leaves almost no room for extra money for things like gas, my dog, food, entertainment or whatever. So I'm just kinda waiting to see how it all turns out. All of these payments really put a lot of pressure on someone who is new to this kind of stuff. The main concern is keeping your credit score up as high as it can be. Having good credit really opens the doors to a lot of different financial options. As of right now I have no credit to show because I am so young and I have never had to pay any bills before but now that I have bills to pay hopefully sooner or later my credit will begin to go up and everything will be just peachy. Of course bills only come around once a month and checks come out twice a month so that is one beautiful benefit for me. But the dowside is all my bills are due right within about 5 days of one another so basically whatever check that comes out right before them...thats where all that money will go for that check. :( oh well I guess thats life as an adult. Thats what I get.